In your eyes, people can't seem to see anything
because your eyes are covered up by tears! You
are constantly hurt and depressed... No one
seems to understand how you feel because
everyone is scared to get close to you... You
long to be able to reach out and tell someone
everything, and all of your problems... But you
have no one to tell, or they just don't seem to
want to hear what you have to say. You've been
hurt many times that you don't seem to have any
tears left to shed, or if you do, they're an
endless river flowing... You've started to hide
and bottle up all or your problems and
feelings, hoping that maybe they just will go
away... You want company, but at the same time,
you're scared of it. Your sanctuary is your
room where you can just be alone and try to
throw away all of your aching pains. You're
dark and mysterious and people like you for
that reason. Even if you think you're all by
yourself in the dark, someone is always there
with you. Your special someone wants to admit
and show their feelings towards you, but
they're afraid of how you'll take it. Get out
more and enjoy life because, it is far too long
to frown your way through :)

What Lies Behind Your Eyes?
brought to you by

I went into Hawthorn today to buy my winter uniform as i had no chance of getting into school before the new term started, so mum decided we'd go on a good ol' drive and get it. Such a riveting trip if i do say so myself, only to find out they forget to put in my blue socks that i clearly requested. Whatta dumb fuck. But in this store there was also a 'surf' shop, and so i decided to take a look, not daring to ask for anything as mum had just spent over $400 on my uniform. However, mum [weirdly] pointed out this black bag, which i will admit is HOT stuff, and i love it and it has badges on it and stuff, and it was $35, which i frankly think is too much for a small bag you put over your shoulder and is quite small in size, but suprising mum didn't think so, so i therefore took up the opportunity to get this bag. Then we went to Southland and went bra shopping. Phwoar, even more riveting. The bra's my mum picks out.. pink lacy stuff..blech.. I resulted in buying a plain black bra.. [just thought you'd like to know.]

I'm completely frustrated and confused at the fact that I am liking and loving a Missy Higgins song. That 'the special two' song has seriously done it for me. I'm going nuts and singing it everywhere, and it's just not me at all. However, i just thought i'd share with you the line i love the most.. Well actually, i'll share with you two parts in which i like.
"Is it better to tell and hurt, or lie and save your face? Well i guess the answer is; don't do it in the first place"
Basically i believe in this quote immensely. I believe everyone makes mistakes, but frankly, you wouldn't need to lie, if you hadn't done it in the first place.
"Nothing cures the hurt that you bring on by yourself.."
Many people i know complain about how there lives are. Infact, I'm sure i've done that myself, but it's so very true that when someone else hurts you, you can get angry, but if its yourself, there's no way to retaliate.
Just thought I'd share that with you.

Flic and I are meant to be going to the gym on tuesday, which should be a good experience, which I am looking forward to. But i guess thats pretty much it from me.. I'm off to watch some good old traditional aussie rules.

Peace out..

One kiss,
Fulfilled rapture,
Empty heart,
Hollow soul.
How I wished I could stop time.
And rewind it.
Edit.
And erase the lost passion.
And see more than what was seen in a time
Where I drowned myself in daydreams.
Lost myself to tears.
And died every time he touched me.
And I do remember.
Remember the sick,
Agitated, uncomfortable
Feeling deep within me.
And I do remember.
Remember the thoughtless,
Uncaring, emotionless
Ways he killed my spirit.
He pushed me to the edge.
And slowly, I fell off.
They tell me to forget the pain.
But he singed it into my soul.
They tell me not to hate him.
But he's the one who taught me how.
Yesterdays gone.
Tomorrow is not yet here.
And I'm trapped somewhere in-between.

She sits alone
Her only friend is the mirror
Ironically, she sees a girl
Quite pretty, placid
She reaches out a hand
In turn, so does the girl
And she slides her hand down the glass
Like she's wiping away the pain
It’s invisible.
Just like to others, u see an exterior
No pain, only a small smile
Pale skin, the odd freckle
She bites her lip
Her finger glides
Imaginary images appearing in the steam
But the girls gone
Nowhere in sight
And she stares to see a soul so dry
Without a drop of pure anything
But she feels it
Like a blanket of warmth
And then she’s not alone
Shafts of glass surround her
And then it’s over
Everything... gone
Just because she was broken down
By a world of competition, rivalry
And an innocent life gone
A soul that once ran a river
But now it is motionless, almost sour
Stale, you can feel it in the air
And another becomes a victim

In between your arrogance, where do you find the time to judge? How do you establish the idea that you have the right to do this? You don’t. You would squeeze the life out of something just to boost yours. Give you a kick and this... is disgusting. Your world is like a self-centred bundle wrapped entirely in wrapping paper plastered ‘me’ but at the same time you’re wanting everything around you. Multi-talented, you’re also despising those who have this and these are intentions driven by pure self-hatred.

Why do people have to fight, and why do i have to get stuck in the middle of it? For no reason in particular. Why? Why fight in the first place? And why, for gods sake, get me involved? Are you really that self-centred? Do you do it to bring me down with you? I'm fucking sick of it.

Happy Birthday Kimo! ;)

Kimo, Kimo, Kimo, Patience is a virtue! :p

This is an early "happy b'day" for kimo, because it is tomorrow. Oo, i could date this as tomorrow though, and make it look like i said it on the correct date. Meh, nahh.. i'll see you tomorrow anyway. But this is to let everyone know that at this time tomorrow, Kimo will finally be 15!! *dances* I hope you have a good day on our little 'field trip'.. You are going aren't you? Oh dear.. you'll be lucky if you're not..

It has come to my attention that weekends are a waste of time. Teachers think that we're going to do homework. Seriously, are they delusional? I think the number one thing i've done this weekend is sleep. I watch a dvd; I fall asleep. I read a book for english; I fall asleep. There's no stopping the sleeping bug!! Not that I mind however, because sleepings good, but I'm so behind in school work right now. I'm up to my neck in work, and I just can't be bothered doing it. Ah well, english thing is due in about 8 weeks, so perhaps i might have finished my first book and journal by then! ;) "Let us prey"

Well, there really is very little to tell due to the fact Ive done this, but i only decided to do this post because Kimo's a very impatient kid :p.. I shall see you all tomorrow i suppose.

Catch :)

Well well well, Whatta week.

Did i grab your attention? Great, because nothing really did happen. Apart from long boring classes, that is. If i sit through another horrible geography class, i swear i'm going to kill myself. I've almost fallen asleep twice now, and i literally had to hold my eyes open. School shouldn't be like that, should it? Ahh well, and this stupid english preface? I'm over it, and i haven't even started..

Have you noticed how a lot of us nowadays use the word 'like' for no real reason, and repetatively in sentences? Yes, believe it or not, I unfortunately suffer from that. And it's not the fact that i want to, because it shits me, but i've been noticing it. "You know like when we went to the like bar and we like ya know, like had lots of like fun?"
Thats just an example. And no, i don't believe i'm that bad, but i do say it a lot. Just listen to yourselves, and try and stop it, it's actually quite amusing.

I'm going to a party on saturday night. Well mum said maybe but i'll end up going. Except, unfortunately there's a downside. The guy i kind of/used to like will be there and we're not talking at all. He hates me now, coz i apparently embarrased him in front of his mates, however they said i didn't, so i really don't know whats going on. But i'm confused, coz i don't know if i should ignore him, or just act normal.. as in, say hi, and then if he keeps talking, so be it, if not, then i can ignore him. I suppose whatever happens, happens, except i'm friends with his sister, and i might be staying at his. Awkward? I agree.

Anyway, i think that pretty much sums up my riveting and most enjoyable week, and weekend to come. Hope yours was just as good.
Say hi to your mum for me ;)